And I won't tempt the bastard by saying that's a good thing. Or that I am glad.

[But his smile certainly says it all.]

I'm glad you are happy, Livio. You and yours. It tends to come in rare supply, something I am sure I do not need to tell you, I am sure.

[His gaze falls down to where his hands have folded together on his lap. It's Luca's turn to feel a sense of jealousy, even as he kicks himself for so much as having had the thought.]

Keep them close, if you can. And treasure every moment.

Oh, me? [Luca finds himself forcing a smile.] I'm just fine, I can assure you.

[Meanwhile, a nearby stack of planks definitely doesn't start smoldering or anything, what are you talking about?]

[Oops. That's a bit hard to miss, isn't it? Luca recoils, looking altogether troubled at the smoldering flame. It's easily put out, but that's not the point.]

I don't... think it was the heat. [Luca makes a face.] It's gotten harder to control, since I made it back here.

[He weighs his words. Telling... isn't a bad thing. But it's also complicated, and he can't remember how much he's explained about his world and its Beasts to Livio. The last thing he wants is to spend hours breaking it all down.]

I... killed the Phoenix. The thing that gave me power. And so I inherited its strength. I don't think I have fully adjusted to that.

[Unfortunately, though, it's not the only reason he suspects an issue.]

A good thing, I think. He made my life considerably worse.

[Even if he does feel a little... empty now.]

If you have any advice at... keeping strength in check, or... [He trails off.] Emotion, I suppose. That might help.

[If Luca knew what was good for him, he'd just nod and take in Livio's advice. No argument, no being contrary, just quiet acceptance. Unfortunately, however, something about it rubs at him the wrong way. Or maybe it's the fact that he just can't seem to lie to the man.]

I can't... let them happen. They're not fair.

Still. [He shifts a little, uncomfortable both with his feelings and how strong his desire is to actually speak.]

I would hate to make someone else look bad. He- they were in the right, too.

It's just...

[His hands stitch together, then pull apart.]

I reacted poorly, when I realized Clive was gone. And in doing so, I hurt Zahliya. He rightfully broke things off.

[He stops fiddling with his hands finally, opting to instead grip the fabric of his pants.]

I apologized when I came to my senses, but... unlike me, he had only a few minutes to process. And asked for more time, and space.

I deserved the loss, after what I said, but - [His breath hitches.] It hurts when I think about it too long.

Maybe. Maybe not. [He shrugs.] I implied he was not good enough for me, had not done enough for me. After all, I helped chase down his swords, gave him flame when Zonari ripped it from him. And what had he done for me?

[But Luca shakes his head, even as he says it.]

I never asked, though. I expected it, and held it against him when he had no way of knowing. I think... I wanted to have a reason to resent him. To keep holding the people I loved at bay.

[A bitter laugh leaves him as he wipes at his eyes.]

I suppose it worked out in a way.

I care... deeply. I'm sure you do not need me to say that, though.

[Luca knows he wears his heart on his sleeve, and he doesn't even try to pretend otherwise nowadays either.]

I just fear it will not be enough. That it is over and done with. It would be his right, and I will accept that but... [His smile is a watery one.] The in-between, the waiting... It hurts.

[That's some solid advice that Luca... doesn't have time to consider. Not when he's looking at those big massive arms and thinking hugging thoughts. He chews on his lip for a moment, before giving a small nod.]

I... wouldn't mind that.

[Thankfully, Luca doesn't have af ull on breakdown. But he's definitely stil lteary eyed as he leans back and palms at his eyes.]

Sorry. It's been... difficult.