sticksandbones | Get a load of this train wreck!

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gravity falls: stanley pines

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Who: Stan Pines [

charlastan] and YOU
What: June catch-all, recovering from Monster Mushroom Month hulking him into a different kind of Beast
When: All of June
Where: Probably mostly the Pines house, but it'll be good for him to get out and about.
Warnings: CPTSD, aftermath of breakdown, (deer country brand) corruption, mild body horror, hypervigilance, dissociation, amnesia talk, probably some self loathing/depression. Will add more if needed.

A. GET A LOAD OF THIS MONSTER - HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO COMMUNICATE (Pines House, Closed to the Pines)
[For all of May, a big fiery dog ran around the grove ruining garbage cans and trying to hide from any perceived threats it couldn't scare off or fight. Now, heading into June, that dog is gone and Stan Pines is left behind.

On a base level, he's fine - or, he should be fine. He's not a hellhound anymore! That's great, isn't it? Everything can just go back to normal and they can just sweep all of this under the rug like it never happened. He spent all month running away from everyone and he can run away from this too.

But then he gets a look in the mirror, and suddenly he gets why everyone's been looking at him like he's lost it.

His skin is ashy and his eyes are bright blue in an almost alien sort of way. There's also a lot more of them than usual, four vaguely tear-drop shaped things clustered around his right eye. Patches of skin are flaking off into ashes, revealing blue fire burning underneath. He can't feel any of it though, he can't even see out of the extra eyes, but what he does notice on his own is how he still has sharp fangs that feel too big for his mouth. No wonder they didn't give him back his dentures. He lifts up a hand, like he's going to be able to wipe away what's on the glass, but stops when he sees that hand has claws attached, sharp and black - a reminder of the creature he was, the Beast that's so close to ripping back out of him just by thinking about it. He tries to laugh it off, but for once no sound comes out.

Time skips.

He's in the bathroom, trying to scrub the black off his hands, but they won't come clean. They don't look like his hands, and the stupid fangs won't come out either. Fuck if he remembers how he got there or what he said to leave everyone in the dust, but he's there now. He closes his eyes, not sure if he's closing two or six, and tries to catch his breath, bring himself back to the moment. He can feel his beating heart, but he ignores it to listen for anyone lurking outside the door. God, this was a dumb move.]

B. HIS MIND IS IN A DIFFERENT PLACE (Pines house, early-mid June)
[It get easier day by day. Talking about it still sucks, but he's been pushed into this weird corner where no one in this goddamn house is going to believe him if he says he's fine, so he's been tentatively letting people baby him in whatever ways they want. It's harder than when he lost his memories. At least then he didn't really know them and didn't remember any of the very valid reasons he definitely has to be ashamed of accepting help. Plus there was an obvious concrete goal back then - to put all the pieces of his brain back in order.

A lot of it though it just a weird amount of resting? That shouldn't surprise him - he's told Dipper the same thing when he was corrupted to near beasthood, but it's always easier to take care of others than himself. When it's him, it just feels like he's slacking. Shouldn't he be doing something else?!

He's kind of skittish about it at first. Napping is one thing - he's an old man, he's allowed to nap wherever and whenever he wants - but there's something embarrassing about getting caught doing other just for fun tasks when he wasn't expecting anyone to notice. It's hard to let go of being on guard all the fucking time, so if you see him with a book in hand that's immediately going behind his back where no one can see it. The glasses he's wearing are different though - an old pair he found when they were originally investigating the house.]

...What? You didn't see anything!

C. WILL EVERYBODY PLEASE GIVE HIM A LITTLE BIT OF SPACE? (out and about, mid-late June)

[By the end of the month, he's getting out more. More specifically, he's looking for weird stuff to add to that art room he has. It hit him recently that he's barely touched it since he got here, even though all of the stuff is right there, waiting to be used. A part of him is always going to resist buying things when he could find them on his own, so he's going out for more walks and bringing home weird shit he found on the ground. He's kind of getting the hang of what he can and can't run off with by now. Fish bones are off limits for example but he can run off with a couple of good snowman-style sticks no problem.

He still startles a little when approached suddenly, but he's trying to be cooler about it now that it's been a few weeks. He's pretty sure his complexion's getting a little better already, but that doesn't mean anything when he has a stupid amount of eyes. So when some inevitably looks appropriately horrified, he just flatly answers:]

What, is somethin' on my face?

[He knows damn well there is, but eh. Let the other person squirm about it for once.]

D. WILDCARD (Wherever, Whenever)
[If you want anything else, hit me up! Individual house calls are okay too, if anyone is worried and just wants to check on him. Will match format!]

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[ While Pavlova never had any direct interactions with the scary giant smoke dog, he certainly saw it scuttling about. It was a little hard to ignore, big as it was. It's been gone though, so Pavlova feels a little safer to explore the town and forest (not that it ever stopped him before).

He is however decidedly not anticipating seeing a guy who looks like he rolled around in the fireplace when he heads out to pick berries. He sure is staring but it's not for the reason Stan thinks.

He also does not "approach" so much as he was in the tree the whole time and Was Noticed. Oops he can be really quiet when he doesn't know how to handle a situation.

... At least Ain's situation desensitized him to copious amounts of eyes. ]

Other than it looking like you haven't shaved I think its just your face.

[ he can be a shit right back, thanks.

His little wings fluff and flap as he shifts on the branch he's perched on ]

So what are you doing out here? Who are you?

[Stan rolls his eyes - and all six of them roll.]

Then take a picture, it'll last longer.

[If he's not going to admit why he was staring, then whatever. He doesn't love being watched from a tree but at least he spotted the guy, and no one needs to talk about the shiver that ran down his spine when it seemed like he was being spied on.]

Stan Pines. And I'm...I dunno, just out here. What are you doin' up in a tree watching people like a creep? If you're some kinda cupid, you're a couple months late for Valentine's Day.

[That and he picked maybe the worst target in town.]

[ He will not be doing that, but he doesn't grace that with a response either. ]

I was picking berries and fruit for my dad and I noticed someone I don't know. Duh I'm going to look at you?

[ You could be dangerous? Stranger danger. Also he's curious and nosy. ]

I'm Pavlova Cookie, not cupid. What is that?

[To be fair, Stan does look more on the dangerous side than usual. Fangs and extra eyes and dark claws will do that to a guy. But he lets it go for now.]

Ohhhh, one of those cookie people. Cupid's uh...

[He taps at his chin, thinking on how to explain. This inadvertently makes the ash flake on his face a little bit.]

It's like a weird little pudgy baby with wings and a diaper, and the story is it shoots heart arrows at people to make them "fall in love" or whatever.

[ Oooooh kay. The ash flaking causes him some internal panic because wow that looks like crumbling. He has to remind himself that people don't crumble like cookies do so the ash is actually MORE concerning. But Stan doesn't seem bothered so he's?? Just gonna roll with it he guesses! ]

I'm not a baby or wearing a diaper so I'm not sure where you got that from.

[ He is an archer though. The bow and quiver are on his back, so he can't hide that one. ]

I can't really make people fall in love, either. Love is way too intricate and beautiful to force like that anyway!

[ He can charm them, though, which is like infatuation for a short amount of time. Not mentioning that for the sake of the argument. ]

[Stan raises an eyebrow, and his extra eyes arch along with it. He doesn't feel the ash at first, but he notices it on his clawed finger and tries to flick it away.]

I dunno, the wings? The arrows? The overwhelming amount of pink?

[These are all pretty damning, but then the kid starts talking about how intricate and beautiful love is, and if he hears any more, Stan is going to gag.]

Yeah, yeah - sounds like something a dumb Cupid would say to sell their bit about how wonderful and magical love is.

Pink? That's just because of the strawberries and raspberries in my dough. My mom has wings.

[ He points at his tart halo-- though the fruit on it was fake now. He seems a little disgruntled, though. He didn't think being pink or having wings was bad.

He's not sure how to take the "sell their bit" part. ]

What bit? I just love love. It's beautiful! I guess it's different if you can't see it yourself. It shines so brightly, like a little sun.

[ And it can burn just as hot and destroy all it touches. Seems like Stan knows that well enough. ]

[It's less a problem with pink specifically and more a problem from growing up in a certain generation that liked to force toxic masculinity on people. Which is to say, he doesn't explain himself at all.]

Yeah, and y'know what else the sun does? It makes you go blind if you look at it! It'll give you sunburns! And...heat stroke, I think? That sounds familiar.

[Huh. Where does he know about that from? He seems kind of lost in thought for a second before he tries to shake it off with a literal shake of his head.]

Nevermind. Point is, this is all the kinda stuff a cupid would go around saying.

Well I'm not one. I was a Cookie, and now I'm... I think dad called it 'human'?

[ his dad also calls him a cherub which is what Cupid is. He is not mentioning that. ]

Ain warned me about sunburns once. I don't know what that is but it doesn't sound good.

Yeah, you're pretty pale as a human. You'd sunburn pretty easily.

[Stan grins in a way that Pav will come to learn means "you will regret giving him the opening to mess with you". He fusses with the spot of ash that flaked earlier, just to call attention to it.]

See how my skin's all grey and comes off easy? A sunburn's like that except you turn bright red! It stings like heck and it just peels and peels and peels forever.

[ Pavlova looks positively affronted by that description, but the way his eyes squint imply he doesn't entirely believe him. There are very few he'd believe at their word implicitly, especially when grinning like that. ]

I feel like that's an exaggeration. Miss White Lily Cookie mentioned these bodies were pretty sturdy. I can't imagine they'd unravel under the sun like a pastry if that's true...

[Flamebringer, meanwhile... he's just out wandering on his panther paws because he Can. It's not that he was looking for Stan in specific, but he finds himself coming up here either way. Part of him does wonder if Stan ever undogged... looks like that might be the case this time.]

Whatever you say, zeyde. [He didn't see anything, fine, fine.] Glad to see you're not eating my trash today.

[He did indeed undog, but anyone who met him while he was one will see the scars it left behind - the extra eyes and burning wounds and the fangs that don't really fit. He's out on the porch couch where his family might not be able to catch him reading a book like a nerd. When he spots the blob that is Flamebringer and hears him he perks up for a second, but falters at mention of the trash.]

Oh, uh. Guess you saw all that, huh?

[Punctuated with an awkward laugh, because nothing is more awkward than being confronted with something he only barely remembers. He takes a second to swap the magic reading glasses for his regular ones - and that actually helps a little, with some squinting.]

Wait, I do kinda remember a giant cat...

That was me. I was trying to keep you from hauling ass into the woods and burning down the bakery both. It took me a second to recognize you. I didn't realise the mushrooms were gonna fuck you up that bad, since most of us just became normal-ass animals.

[Ezell's a bunny, Add's a snake, Wolfwood is... a wolf, surprise surprise. Animals. He supposes Stan was also an animal, but most dogs don't exactly have fiery vents all over their bodies.]

You're fine, right? It's not like I wanted to freak you out. If I could fit my cat ass in the bakery, I would've gotten you something good to eat.

[Stan help cringing at mention of the bakery. Right, he almost did that...eesh.]

Heh. I bet! But yeah, I'm...good. Kinda.

[He's literally not; he's got extra eyes and fangs and claws.]

I mean, I didn't think it was gonna fuck me up that bad either! But as soon as I stepped on the mushroom and started changing I panicked and...hulked out into a Beast, apparently? The whole thing's kind of a blur, but apparently we're lucky I didn't try and eat half the town.

I'll say. What's this Beast thing anyway? If I'm understanding you right, you're not using "beast" in the sense that we all hulked out into something different, right?

[Plopping his cat ass down and loafing nearby... tell him a story, gramps.]

Yeah, definitely somethin' different.

[Stan heaves a sigh but he also settles in for story time, making himself comfy on the porch couch again.]

So, in the last place me and my family got stuck in, it kinda...messed with us? We're not 100% human anymore and now we've got weird magic blood. It's why I can do the fire stuff!

[This is normally the point where he'd be showing that off, but he's supposed to be "taking it easy", whatever that's supposed to mean.]

Anyway, Trench was full of blood magic, so it would kinda poison the air and make people lose their marbles if they were exposed to too much of it. Everyone called it corruption, but I'm pretty sure if I call it that here I'm gonna get dragged out in the forest and shot.

[He laughs! This is a funny thing he's said!]

The idea is, if you don't "take care of yourself"-- [Finger quotes included.] --you just sort of get worse and worse in the head until eventually you turn into a huge monster that doesn't know who or what it is anymore. Usually the only way to undo it by that point is to put 'em outta their misery, and even in a place where people come back from the dead, it ain't exactly a picnic.

[Best case scenario, you put down someone you love. Worst case scenario, someone you love rips you apart.]

[ Mamika hasn't messed with the weird fairy mushrooms - not yet, anyway. She knows vaguely what's going on, even if it might be a little weird. Hellhound Stan and Panther Flamebringer and Werewolf Wolfwood... all her family-adjacent figures seem to be having a time of it. And, well, of course she's going to be checking up on them occasionally.

Certainly the one she, y'know, lives with.

She doesn't mean to eavesdrop with the turmoil Stan's currently dealing with in the bathroom, but it's not like it's an easy thing to miss. If she weren't so intent on Helping People All The Time(tm), she might've had the social grace to let Stan get his bearings before springing the aggressively pink sunshine that is Mamika. But here she is! Surprise- ]

Mister Uncle? Is everything alright...?

[This whole thing has gone on long enough, hasn't it? Stan being so unbelievably stubborn about everything? About him trying to brush off what was definitely beasthood? About how he keeps running away from these issues and they keep getting worse? Dipper isn't even sure if Stan will talk to him.]

[Every time he tries to have a conversation like this with him it always ends in a shouting match between them, but he isn't sure what else he can do.]

[He has told Ford that he's planning to try and talk to him, following Stan to the bathroom where he seems to have disappeared to. He gives him a few moments before knocking on the door.]

Grunkle Stan?

[Any time they've tried to talk about this before, it's ended in disaster. They're both stubborn as hell, and neither of them are great at leaving well enough alone. Or, in Stan's case, letting someone help when he needs it.

Dipper doesn't need to see Stan white-knuckling the bathroom sink to have some idea what's happening in there. The door muffles it some, of course, but that stress and fear and shame that Dipper's felt and called Stan out on before is bigger and louder than before, and returning to human form more corrupted than he was before has only made it worse. It's turned into something he can't just hide, or lie about anymore, and lying's supposed to be the one thing he's good at!

When Dipper knocks it spikes for just a second, but as it sinks in who it is it fades. He has to steel himself just a moment, but eventually he makes his voice work.]

...Yeah. Yeah, I'm here. Just, uh. Hang on...

[He sounds a little defeated. He's literally backed himself into a corner here, and something about that has his brain burning even more, but he has to pump the breaks on that thought. He didn't even really mean to run off; it just sort of happened and now there's no coming back from it.

It probably doesn't make sense since anyone outside the door would have heard the sink running while he tried to get the dark marks off of himself, but he still flushes the toilet as though it's going to actually fool anyone. And truthfully he's about to come out, he really is, but he hesitates at the door handle - for a different reason this time.]

You, uh. ...you gonna be alright out there? With, y'know. [He clears his throat to try and cover up the concern.] The whole empathy thing...?

[He's a lot right now and he knows he's a lot right now, and if they're going to drag him into some dumb feelings conversation then he doesn't want Dipper's powers going haywire. They're already dealing with one potential beast, after all.]

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Get a load of this train wreck! | OPEN

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cw: being w a y too flippant about death more than once in a single tag

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